So there I stand on 11:49 pm, Tuesday night at the Jewel/Osco buying the Queen a birthday card. I need to buy a card because I forgot to on my way home from work, and the Queen will expect it sitting on the kitchen table when she wakes up. Actually, I have to buy two. The Princess also needs to buy Mommy a card, but she alleges that she can't go card shopping because "She Can't Read." Frankly, I think she just didn't want to spend the 2.5 hours is takes to pick out one birthday card, much less two.
Picking out the perfect card takes the endurance of a distance runner to wade through the crapfest produced by the greeting card industry. If you haven't visited the card aisle in a while, then you are a bad person. If you have tried to buy a winner, then you know that birthday cards only come in five different varieties:
Jack Grubb writes an incredible blog, Losing the Internets, which is read by at least 37 people and over 2,100 Russian SPAM bots. In his spare time he helps small companies find their marketing voice. Jack currently lives deliberately in Appalachia, Kentucky with his wife, two daughters, Jack Russell and a Lego collection beyond compare.